Even here, I walk in love.

I feel like it’s been a while since I have blogged. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say, it’s more like I feel like there is so much in my brain that I don’t know how to order it? 4 Down! This right here seems crazy to me. Since it has been 3 months since I started this journey. Some days it feels like I have been here forever and others it feels like I just started. I am at the point where I am done being the sick girl if you get what I mean. Everyone has been amazing but I don’t want to need help anymore? Make sense? Like I just want to be normal, do normal people things. Shower, go to work (outside of the house) I have been working mostly from home, make my bed (even that makes me out of breath) I guess it is just realizing the things that I have taken for granted. I pray that I never take “normal” things for granted again. I know hard to say but something that I am definitely going to work on. Amazing through it all I know that the Lord has me and that brings me joy, even in the darkest times.

Thursday went well, no issues, slept a lot. Honestly I thought I would have all this time to sit and crochet and make fun stuff for the people around me going through the same thing but I sleep during chemo. Friday and Saturday were much the same, sleep. We have been doing the neulasta shot at 72 hours instead of 27 which seems to make a big difference with the bone pain, the only thing is that I have to stick myself with a big needle!!! But I’m a big girl and have done it twice now!!

We meet with the plastic surgeon tomorrow so we will have a better idea of what surgery looks like. And I did find out that I will need 15 rounds of radiation which I wasn’t stoked about but it is the plan and I am believing in the plan. AND I know God’s plan is perfect for me. Good news is that it will be done in the original time line in my head!

We are hanging in there! Cam got his license which is helpful when all I want is McDonald’s French Fries, yup have no idea why I never eat there but on Sunday that is all I wanted!! I’m looking forward to going to watch him play basketball! Emma went back to school for 10 days and will be home in just a few days! She of course is killing school and we are so proud of her. Eric is working hard at holding down the fort while still transitioning to full time realtor. Being self employed and caring for someone with Cancer is no easy task. It drains you physically and emotionally. You have to be on for your clients and sometimes you just aren’t feeling it. BUT He is doing it! He has been out showing houses every weekend! Looking to buy or sell, give him a call!

In this time of Advent, give yourself time to rest. (and not getting sick forced to rest) rest is doing something for YOU, do something that makes you smile. Rest in the Lord. Advent is a season of Joy, what brings you Joy?